Honestly I don't want to sleep

I’m afraid to go to sleep.




In my dreams I’m trapped



Running underground



Dirty, frightened, wild



I don’t want to close my eyes.



But I sleep still, I sleep for days



Waking up is scary too



I live a strange life



I live most of it in my head



Because I am so disappointed with my reality



It comes in shades of gray



I’m addicted to color because I can’t manifest any myself



I don’t want to kill the songbirds



What other sacrifices have I made in the face of fear



I sleep because I can’t face the day



I dream to create something better



But all my mind can give me are shadows